Cheer You Up

<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/1910926976326845670?origin\x3dhttp://cheer--you--up.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

Cheer You Up

life's little ironies

thanks for stopping by

Profile entries Tagboard Affiliates

Day 1

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Day 1 in bali

Really just spending time to myself, or the occasional passing conversation with family members (grandparents, extended family - this being a 9 person holiday after all). Not that I'm bad with conversation or particularly introverted at all, which some people can attest to but I appreciate alone time after what's been another year of extroversion peppered with introspective moments. But even such an evaluation of myself may not be the truest reflection of who I really am or who I want to be (?). I guess I opted for a lepak holiday because from past experiences I've had lots of particularly interesting thoughts or prompts on holiday, some of which I'd never gotten the opportunity to record. Plus there's something to be said for how going on holiday literally separates you from things back at home, and with it comes this sort of mental freshness and release.

There are a few things that I pride myself in, and also a few things that I like to have. I like having large social circles, which boils down to my understandable aversion to being lonely (which isn't spending time alone but rather surrounded by people whom I have absolutely no connection with / floundering in unfamiliar settings). Something else popped into mind earlier this week, that while I appreciate certain constants in life I actively look forward to change or at least the prospect of new experiences in new or old environments. In essence I'm always looking for new things to do, new tasks to accomplish.

Anyway everything has an expiry, as cliche as this comes across. People die, worlds get destroyed and relationships wither. To some extent I'll put it down to a way of life, but also things have to be started before they can end, and if not started properly, or started with skewed intentions then for all the right reasons it has to end. I deplore such actions but being actively an amalgamation of antinomies there's really little end to all this (I'm sure if I had a sister she'd have a lot to say about this). Also i'm really bad at drawing lines.

Also I appreciate my life being an open book, but I'm not that kind of person to such an extent as to broadcast everything online. I suppose it's because I want my friendships to be formed from whoever it is understanding who I really am than basing it on a less than empirical understanding of me. Unless of course I have no vested interest in the relationship which in that case I'm considerably more apathetic (there really is much more to be said about this).

Lastly, here's to happy coincidences and the epitomes of fate (which I do believe in, or at least that everything happens for a reason). Feeling happy really hahahaha.

On a side note, and this is old news (for me and some friends) but I got into JCHP which is a massive relief, but also a call to buck up and seriously work on certain aspects of myself, academically.

On another note, I really cannot fully get over the fact that I so wrongfully misjudged someone to the extent that I let my evaluation and treatment of them be so badly warped and twisted. Especially given how ordinary and different they are from what I'd thought. Oops.

(because of inclement weather we weren't able to go sightseeing, or maybe I love myself too much)